Attachment based Counselling/Psychotherapy London Bridge & Clapham

 

 

Its good to talk - Counselling

 

My name is Mehmet, I am a attachment based Psychotherapist offering counselling in London Bridge & Clapham. I work with individuals and couples. I am BACP registered.

Please check my website for further details.

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Counselling Clapham & South West London

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I am a fully qualified integrative counsellor and a registered member of the BACP ( British Association Counselling and Psychotherapy)

I run my practice from Clapham High Street . My practice is walking distance from Clapham North, Clapham Park and Clapham South underground. I work with individuals and couples

Please visit my website for further information

 

http://www.londonandclaphamcounselling.co.uk

Posted in Clapham Common, Clapham Counselling, Clapham High St, Clapham North, Clapham South, Counselling, counselling clapham, Counselling Clapham Common SW4, counselling clapham sw4, Counselling in Clapham, Counselling South West London, Couples Counselling Clapham, LGBT Counselling Clapham | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Counselling London Bridge SE1

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I am a fully qualified integrative counsellor and a registered member of the BACP ( British Association Counselling and Psychotherapy)

I run my practice from the Psychosynthesis Centre on Tooley Street . I work with individuals and couples. If you are looking for counselling  I look forward to hearing from you.

Please visit my website for further information

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Counselling Clapham SW4, Counselling South West London, Attachment Therapist Clapham.

Counselling Clapham, Clapham Counselling, Clapham Counsellor 

I am a qualified counsellor and registered member of the  British Association for Counselling & Psychotherapy (BACP) based in Clapham SW4, London Bridge SE1. I originally trained as an integrative counsellor but have since expanded and continued my professional development in Attachment therapy at the Wimbledon Guild and the Bowlby Centre. I strongly believe in the importance of early relationships and how they determine our behaviours in our Adult lives. How we deal with hurt and emotions and conflict are all a result of past relationships. I invite clients who are interested in understanding how their past plays out today.  These can be issues to do with relationships, loneliness, anger, rage, addiction, self-harm, paranoia, obsessive-compulsive behaviours, anxiety, social anxiety; the list is endless. Understanding oneself and the uncomfortable feelings experienced that, rationally have no explanation, is the key to a happier and more fulfilling life.

If you believe your unhappiness is a result of your past and want to explore and work through those issues, I invite you to contact me for an initial consultation

 

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Posted in Balham, Brixton, Clapham Common, Clapham Counselling, Clapham High St, Clapham North, Clapham South, Counselling Central London, Counselling Clapham Common SW4, Counselling in Balham, Counselling in Brixton, Counselling in Clapham, Couples Counselling Clapham, Couples Counselling Greenwich SE10, LGBT Counselling Clapham | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Couples Counselling – London Counselling – Clapham SW4

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How can counselling for couples help?

 

A relationship or marriage can easily fall into conflict. We stop listening and communicating our needs clearly. Talking to someone neutral may be all that it takes for you to have clarity. What couples counselling offers here is the opportunity to speak to someone who has no preconceived notions of who you are as a couple, bonus of having skills and training to guide you through your worries. 

 

The overall aim of couples counselling is to assist you

  • Understand how external factors such as family values, religion, lifestyle and culture affect your relationship.
  • Reflect on the past and how it operates in the present.
  • Communicating constructively 
  • Learn why arguments escalate.
  • Negotiate and resolve conflicts where possible.

 

Through counselling, you and your partner may find a new way of communicating and understand each other and how to work as a unit, or you may decide it is time to part ways. Either way, counselling offers the safe space to explore, grow and decide what you would like the future to hold for you. 

 

As your counselling sessions progress, you and your partner may find a way of overcoming your problems, or you may decide it is time to part ways. Either way, hopefully, counselling will offer you the space to grow and decide what you would like the future to hold for both of you.

Common problems explored

There are many different concerns that may bring you to couples counselling, ranging from a lack of communication right through to a betrayal or affair. Some common issues that can be explored through couples counselling include:

  • lack of trust
  • betrayal or affair
  • jealousy
  • lack of communication
  • financial issues
  • work-related stress
  • different sexual needs or other sexual issues
  • family conflicts
  • different goals and values
  • different parenting styles
  • life changes.
  • Attachment Styles 
  • Control 

If you are interested in engaging in couples counselling I look forward to hearing from you to discuss your needs further. 

Posted in Abbeville Road SW4, Balham, Brixton, Clapham Common, Clapham Counselling, Clapham North, Clapham South, Counselling, Counselling Central London, Counselling Clapham Common SW4, counselling clapham sw4, Counselling in Balham, Counselling in Brixton, Counselling in Stockwell, Counselling South West London | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Counselling Clapham North, Clapham South, Clapham Common

 

 

 

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I am a fully qualified counsellor practising in Clapham. My practice is based on Clapham High Street. The nearest stations are Clapham North, Clapham Common, Clapham High Street and Clapham South.

Please visit my website for further information – www.londonandclaphamcounselling.co.uk

Posted in Clapham Common, Clapham Counselling, Clapham High St, Clapham North, Clapham South, Counselling, Counselling Central London, Counselling Clapham Common SW4, counselling clapham sw4, Counselling in Balham, Counselling in Clapham | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Attachment Theory

 

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Seeing the world through the attachment lens

We are born into this world through another human being. Our basic needs – food, water, and being kept warm and clean – are elementary things that we need in order to survive. However, those needs, which are primitive,  are not enough on their own.  Our innate drive may well be to survive in any given situation, but care, interaction, a safe home and emotional bonds between ourselves and our caregivers are vital in how we see the world and in our emotional experience of it. We are moulded by our environment, culture, religion, and our interactions with our caregivers and people who we have regular direct contact with.

Through our vital early years, primarily through the medium of maternal care, which comes in both physical and emotional form, we learn how to relate to the world.  As adults, we are mostly unaware that our early attachment experiences become our attachment styles. This plays out in most of our relationships: how we see ourselves in relation to others; how we deal with conflict; how available or not we are in our relationships; how we trust  others; how we deal with loneliness; how we hold onto certain relationships out of fear; how we feel we need the other to make us whole.  The list is endless.

I believe in attachment theory. It makes sense. It lies at the very core of each and every one of us. Take a look around you, we are social by nature we need interaction to survive.

Understanding oneself is the key to change. Our attachment styles are not set in stone and through exploration we are able to empower ourselves and change as we develop stronger and healthier relationships.

 

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Posted in Counselling, Counselling Central London, Counselling Clapham Common SW4, counselling clapham sw4, Counselling in Clapham, Counselling in London, Counselling in Stockwell, Counselling London Bridge SE1, Counselling Skype Sessions, Counselling South East London, Counselling South West London, Couples Counselling Clapham | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Her Self

 

HER- SELF – A six-week course to empower women with the tools & insights to develop emotional resilience, self-confidence, acceptance and trust in themselves.

 

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Mariam is a qualified Counsellor/Psychotherapist and has years of experience working with a range of issues in her private practice in Clapham.  The programme she will be running is designed to enable women to develop self-esteem, emotional resilience, confidence and trust in themselves.

I had always lived in someone else’s shadow, and working with Mariam opened a tightly closed door to my own life, I was accepted for who I am and I began to grow into myself. Mariam helped me to find love and accept myself as I am, without pretending or wearing masks to hide away. She always believed in me, and I finally believe in myself. With her help, have gained freedom in all its beauty. (Testimonial) 
 
My time with Mariam has been one of the most rewarding experiences of my life. I found her to be kind, warm and skilful; in short very good at what she does. I felt comfortable in her company and without really realising it, was quickly able to trust her and trust that she valued my experiences and was committed to helping me understand these issues. I was  helped me to work through some long-held painful experiences, and to develop a sense of confidence so that I can accept and move forward in my life. (Testimonial) 
 

Please check out the website for more details – www.mb-therapy.co.uk

The programme will run for six consecutive Tuesday evenings from 11th October.

See www.mb-therapy.co.uk/courses for more info.

Posted in anxiety workshop brixton, anxiety workshop clapham, Tooting, tooting and brixton., Women only workshop Brixton, women's workshop brixton, women's workshop wandsworth, women;s workshop Tooting, womens workshop balham, womens's workshop Clapham | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Couples Counselling – Losing Connection

 

Couples Counselling  London Bridge, Clapham, Beckenham
Couples Counselling
London Bridge, Clapham, Greenwich

“We are never so vulnerable as when we love”

                                      -Sigmund Freud

I recently picked up a  book called ” Hold Me Tight”  by Dr Sue Johnson – I am an attachment based therapist who works with individuals and couples and found Dr Sue Johnson’s book to be probably the best book I have read on couples counselling. To me, it made total sense so I have quoted directly from the book to share the magic.

Attachment theory teaches us that our loved one is our shelter in life. When that person is emotionally unavailable or unresponsive, we face being out in the cold, alone and helpless. We are assailed by emotions-anger, hurt and above all, fear. This is not surprising when we remember that fear is our built in alarm system: it turns on when our survival is threatened. Losing connection with our loved one jeopardizes our sense of security. The alarm goes off in the brain’s amygdala. This almond-shaped area in the midbrain triggers and automatic response. We don’t think; we feel, we act.

We all experience some fear when we have disagreements or arguments with our partners. But for those of us with secure bonds, it is a momentary blip. The fear is quickly and easily tamped down as we realize that here is no real threat or that our partner will assure us if we ask. For those of us with weaker or fraying bonds, however, the fear can be overwhelming. We are swamped by intense primal panic. We generally do one of two things: we either become demanding and clinging to draw comfort and reassurance from our partner, or we withdraw and detach in an attempt to soothe and protect ourselves. No matter the exact words, what we’re actually saying in these reactions is: “Notice me. Be with me. I need you,” Or, “ I won’t let you hurt me I will chill out, try to stay in control,”
These strategies for dealing with the fear of losing connection are unconscious, and they work, at least in beginning. But as distressed partners resort to them more and more, they set up vicious spirals of insecurity that only push them further apart. More and more interactions occur in which neither partner feels safe, both become defensive, and each is left assuming the very worst about each other and their relationship.
If we love our partners, why do we not just hear each others calls for attention and connection and respond with caring? Because much of the time we are not tuned into our partners. We are distracted or caught up in our own agendas We do not know how to speak the language of attachment, we do not give clear messages about what we need or how much we care. Often we talk tentatively because we feel ambivalent about our own needs. Or we send out calls for connection tinged with anger and frustration because we do not feel confident and safe in our relationships. We wind up demanding rather than requesting, which often leads to power struggles rather than embraces. Some of us try to minimize our natural longing to be emotionally close and focus instead on actions that give only limited expression to our need. The most common: focusing on sex. Disguised and distorted messages keep us from being exposed in all our naked longing, but they also make it harder for our lovers to respond.

Reference (Hold me Tight)  Dr Sue Johnson Johnson, S.  (2008).  Hold Me Tight: 
 

My practice is based in Clapham, nearest stations are Clapham North, Clapham Park, Clapham South.  I offer individual and couples counseling. If you are having issues in your relationship and would like to engage in couples counselling I look forward to hearing from you.

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Its good to talk - Counselling

Its Good to talk - Mehmet AltanCounsellor in Clapham bacp member

Posted in Clapham Counselling, Counselling Clapham Common SW4, counselling clapham sw4, Counselling Greenwich SE10, Counselling in Balham, Counselling in Brixton, Counselling in Clapham, Counselling in Stockwell, Counselling London Bridge SE1, Couples Counselling Clapham, Marriage Counselling, Stockwell | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Sexual Compulsive Disorder

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Are you Sexually Compulsive 

Do your sexual fantasies become compulsive and drive you to act on them?

Is it affecting your family, relationships,  and friendships?

Are you acting out and taking risks to fulfil your fantasies but then left feeling depressed, empty, shameful with yourself.

Are you longing for a long lasting, loving relationship but finding that you are failing?

Is addiction taking over your life, slowly destroying it and you feel you have no control?

Sexual addiction is real and can take over your life, Ruin friendships, and relationships, take you away from the important things in your life interfere with your work and hobbies getting in the way of haveing a lasting intimate relationship.

If you are struggling with the above and are ready to manage your urges, then contact me for an initial consultation to see how I can help you.

 

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Posted in Beckenham Counselling, Clapham Counselling, Counselling, Counselling Beckenham BR3, Counselling Central London, Counselling Clapham Common SW4, counselling clapham sw4, Counselling Greenwich SE10, Counselling in London, Counselling London Bridge SE1, Counselling South West London | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment